Post Separation Counselling

Co Parenting Support

Over the last 10 years I have worked with many people going through separation, both on an individual level as well as through the facilitation  of group post separation programs.

I owe a debt of gratitude to the many people I have seen for allowing me to witness their struggle and for teaching me much of what I know about the subject.

Most parents who are in process of separating or in the aftermath, are anxious to do the best by their children and minimise harm.

At a time when we need to be able to handle our fight/flight brain for the sake of our children, it is often for most of us, the hardest time to do this and sadly, all too often, separating parents struggle to keep their relationship issues out of the co parenting space.

Profound grief, shock, anger, bitterness often fuels vitriolic conflict cycles and continual arguments about what is best for the children. This often creates the very environment that parents are trying to avoid - one that has the potential to cause emotional distress and psychological harm to their children.

 

My Co parenting support is flexible, depending on the needs of the situation and can include:

 

  • Communication Coaching to build Cooperative Parenting 

  • Ideas for Co Parenting Models 

  • Ideas on how to best support your children

  • Support for Separation Recovery

  • A voice for your children

 

Depending on the situation and nature of conflict, my co parenting support will either be in the form of joint sessions or individual. 

Your Child's Voice

Traditionally children had little say in separation. Separation and divorce was seen as ‘adults’ business.’ Children can experience separation as a time of profound distress, and while some can report relief, they can also experience confusion, shock, fear, loneliness and grief. Some can experience ‘conflicting loyalties,’ feel caught in the middle or a misplaced pressure to take sides with one parent or another. Most significant is that children can feel isolated in their experience, and  unsure about who or where they can safely talk about things. Often parents are so caught up in their own distress, that they are not so tuned in or available to support the kids.

 

I am passionate about supporting children to have a say in the separation process, and have  a safe space to talk about their experience. Sometimes this takes the form of a series of sessions to process their experience, sometimes it takes the form of a child consult process.

Child Consults

The Child consult process is an invaluable process where I support children to share their experience of the separation and any needs they might have, and with their permission, directly feed this back to the parents. This often involves one or two sessions with the child (without either parent present), and then one feedback session with each individual parent.